The World.....

Today woke up my eyes, a little more than comfortable, but then again, i want my eyes open to horrors because you people ignore them like there's nothing. You address bondage and sex slavery like it's natural to be in other countries, and it's not, not at all, it's evil and wrong but you know, we're too conceived within our own little world, our own drama, and our own schedules to give a fuck about them, people are dying, a friend of mine got raped last week even, i just found out someone i loved has also, but never told me, her best friend is in the hospital, prayers for him, and her in fact because she's a mess. prayers for my other friend who's older brother's friend was in a car accident and passed away, prayers for me, as i piece myself together from my meltdown smoking is a bad thing don't start.

but of course, no one reads this so it'll just pass like nothing has happened.

Listening : Copeland - You Are My Sunshine.
Watching : Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events (Yes Jim Carrey)

lovelovelove.

wip brb

I feel, like we've become oh so distant.
I used to have a voice,
but it seems so quiet anymore.
and i gotta, pick myself up.
do the chore that i've been putting off

h.o

Run, Run Run, To Me,
I'm Still Blind, Help Me See?
Be The Center of My Gravity.
I Picture You So Perfectly.
Don't Talk,
This Silence Is The Best Thing.
I Could Ever Ask For.

I am, The Luckiest.

I'm looking around and realize, that all i want is right in front of me, my friends, my family, my music, and like ferealz idk what i'd do without these people, and i'm just thanking God for what i have, i feel lucky to have people. The only thing missing is a girl, and I've fucked up so much so it's just crazy how i'm still just like, yeah relationships suck, there's no love, i'm sure there is somewhere, It's just, what i've run into just lowered my hopes and i guess, i just want to be loved by someone, who will love me even if i fuck up, and wion't try to change, i wanna look into a girls eyes and be like, i'm the luckiest, you are fucking amazing.

Listening - Ben Folds.
Reading - Romeo and Juliet

Drink My Beer and Smoke My Weed. xD

Wow, 3 Weeks, not sober for a full day.
Pulls up my point on how life goes on without a relationship.
I'm lovin this though, but a relationship would be nice,
Goign To C-Reed's Tonight, Get More Fucked Up.

I Think...

Listening (Alot This Time)
Almost Home - The Academy Is...
Castles of Ice - Minus The Bear
You Are My Sunshine - Copeland
Canvas EP - The Sibling

That i'mm gonna spend some time on this new girl that's prob reading this blog xD
she seems like someone i'd like to spend time with =D
like i ranted about how i hate relationships, not true, i hate getting hurt in relationships,
and basically i wanna have one that's enjoyable, and that doesn't hurt me or whomever she is.
so that's my thought today.

I Got A Bulletproof Vest On.

listening: Dance Gavin Dance - Self Titled
watching: Icarly xD

Soooo Time to Dump My Thoughts out on this random output yet again.
This past week has been, idk for me, and i haven't been writing alot at all.
Music-wise it's amazing, i have DS down, and we're gonna write some more, and if i get lucky i might, and i mean MIGHT as in have no clue join the sibling.
Butt continuing i'm just like realizing all my philosphies are pretty much right, but like the right where you don't want it to be right. liek i've been constantly screwed up the past week and i really just don't care about relationships anymore, they piss me off, seriouisly, and i've had sex twice in the last fucking week and i also realized how unimportant it is, yet peple make it seem like life depends on who your fucking. urgh it's so material this world, why can't we just focus on what is important to us?

Wait, i can't my mom is a bitch and likes to restrict me from my passion...
Yeah wow i'm just becoming an angry person i hate this new me, but i don't know where to go anymore.
i feel lost, out of place, losing it.

So Basicalllyyyyy

i haven't posted in forever.
i'm sorry.
hahahaha.
my life has been like up lately, well idk which direction it's going.
i'm just getting blown alot lately.
it's just like, i've found no purpose to drive myself any longer than i feel i want too anymore.
the feelings i've had towards people, are inpossible to reciprocate the feelings, and it sucks because love has lost me. and it's fine for now, but it'll suck later.